Sunday, October 30, 2005

Secrets: Lies and Truths

Ten secrets (and not so secrets). Half are true, half are false, but I won't ever say which is which.

1) I have never been trick or treating.

2) In the seventh grade I nearly killed my best freind with an unsharpened pencil.

3) I have never been in love.

4) I'm still scared of what may be lurking behind a closed shower curtian

5) At 20 years old I realized at a lame college party I had a crush on the guy I went with and not the girl I was trying to pick up.

6) I want to die on an absinthe bender when I'm in my thirties amidst a bonfire of all my unfinished and unpublished work. I don't care what happens to the ashes.

7) I lie more often than I tell the truth (about anything and everything)

8) I tell the truth more often than I lie (about anything and everything)

9) I hate Grape Jello.

10) I am brillaint in bed.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

for your edification

I just posted the newest chapter of A Symphony of Sweets on my Fiction Blog. I know techinically I'm late but I'm bending the rules just because of the holidays. this month is filled with Jewish Holidays that just slam into you one right after the other. First Rosh Hashana, the new year, two days long. Ten days later Yom Kippur, the day of repentance, one day long. Five days after that, Sukkot, a harvest holiday, eight days long (though only seven in Israel - I'm not going to get into the detials of jewish law here, just trust me on that). The final two days of Sukkot (In Israel just the last day) are holidays within a the holiday. Shmeeni Atzeret (to be honest I'm not quite sure what the deal is, with this one, I think it has to do with rain and such) and Simchat Torah.

Simchat Torah is actually a pretty fun holiday. A chapter of the Torah (five books of moses) is read every week during saturday morning services. Simchat Torah is the day of celebration when we finish the last chapter of the Torah, then start all over again for the new year. It's as big deal. Big party. In your sunday best (for jews I suppose it's our saturday best) you go to synogogue, hear the first and last chapter of the torah, then everyone dances and sings and gets drunk. As the way the jewish calendar works each day actualy starts at sunset so the holiday starts in the evening. As such the biggest party is in the evening. Some streets in Manahattan actually close to traffic so the Jews can empty from the synogogues dancing with the torahs and each other and singing mostly jewish folk songs and such. The drinking is done before, after and during.

So I'm not complaining that there are so many holidays, just that they come with such quick succession It's hard to get any work done. That's why the posting of the newest chapter is a bit delayed this week.

For those wondering Simchat torah starts this Tuesday night, so if you're bored this tuesday, regardless whether you are Jewish or not, you might want to check out what the local synogogue is doing. Services are always free as are drinks (though said drinks are usually schnapps of some sort and or Manashevitz wine). That's what I'll be doing anyway.

Happy holidays.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

again, too much time on my hands

First I noticed that my previous post was posted twice on the same day for some reason. I deleted the duplicate as duplicates are rarely good (my twin brother found that out the hard way, he will be missed) and now the site is clean. Well, clean in the sense that it's orginized.

Boy howdy, I am not a goth (I don't think I'm an "anything" save really big dork) but I took what I believe to be a very scientific test and found out that if I was a goth this would be me:

Girl Name: Mistress Acaia

Guy Name:Sir Sebastain

* I see
sadness in your heart*

You carry too many
secrets in your heart. You should really try
and vent about things more often.

What Is Your Goth Name?
brought to you by Quizilla

So true, so true.... er what?

post script extra trivia point. Though completely coincidental, Sebastion was also my German name for that one year I studied German in high school. No, I didn't pick the name in either case, but apparently the cosmos is trying to tell me something. I figure I'm either supposed to change my name to Sebastion, kill someone named Sebastion, or marry someone named Sebastion. None of the choices are very appealing as: I like my name; I have taken a vow never to kill (again); and I don't know of any straight women named Sebastion. In theory I could marry a man (as it is legal in my home state of Massachusetts) but contrary to my mother's suspsions (she won't ever admit she suspects, but it's obvious she does) I am not gay. I just wish the cosmos would be more specific.

Monday, October 17, 2005

most people suck

As mentioned in previous posts, I am a member of It's an online forum and workshop for screenwriters and filmmakers created by Kevin Spacey in order to weed out new talent from outside Hollywood. There are over 2000 members and it is free to join. I post under the name Chrysalis because I joined before my epiphany.

Anyway, the dork that I am, I read and post on various threads on the message boards, usually the ones devoted to specific aspects of writing. One such thread was a discussion as to how much one should focus on format when reviewing and rating other people's scripts. There were some complaints that some members are sticklers when it comes to "proper format". I put that in quotes because the main arguement against said sticklers is there is no completely standard screenplay format.

Thing is, there is a stanard format, it's just much more fluid that we give it credit for. In my opinion, format is important (bad formating says almost as much about the writing as it does the writer and distracts from the story) but shouldn't come close to over shadowing the story or the characters in regards to importance in reviewing. A happy middle ground.

But that's all background for this next bit. Because there is some arguement as to what is or is not proper format one member wrote:
"ironically, even the farmat Nazis can't agree on what format is."

First off, that's his misspelling on format, not mine; so there's that. But I let that one slide. What really bothered me was the usage of the word Nazi. And in response (and I guess the fault really is mine because I started this whole stupid thing) I wrote:
First this is my little side rant, (my pet peeve if you will), I know it wasn't meant this way, and this isn't a dig towards the writer, but I really can't stand it when the term nazi is used so loosely. To compare someone who is strict in regards to grammar, spelling, or the sales of soup (regardless as to how funny it is - and that was a funny seinfeld episode) to an ideology of genocide, never sits well with me. One would never call someone else a "spelling klansman", it sounds silly, and that's basically what I hear when I read the word nazi thrown around as such. But that's my thing and this is the end of my rant.

You can judge, but I tried to be civil whilst still getting my point across. My next paragraph (which I won't bore you with) was basically a summery of my thoughts on format, as previuosly discussed in the beginning of this post.

The responses I recieved? Damn did they get my blood boiling. The first basically said (boiling down to the essentials) that I justified the terms usage in my own paragraph because,
But isn't one writer comdemning another writer for being outside their parameters a form of literary genocide?

Not only was that one of the stupidest things I've ever read, I don't know what literary genocide is, save perhaps the wholesale slaughter of authors and poets then burning their work. And I'm pretty sure that's not what this person meant because said member went on and wrote about writers as artists and thinking out of the box and such while not worrying about the little bits and peices. It was a shame really as before I read this post I had some respect (via prevoius posts on different matters) for this member.

The second response - and god, I hope there will be no more - quoted my work then wrote:
wow, you're the biggest semantics nazi I have ever seen.

I've never wanted to kick anyones front teeth in more than I did to this member after reading the post. The term annoying monkey molesting stupid fucking douchebag bastard (commas omited intentionally) is one I rarely dust off, but in this members case the moniker fits because said member really is an annoying monkey molsesting stupid fucking douchbag bastard (and I have the pictures to prove it).

Hedonism bot's favorite websites

My brother just bought seasons three and four of futurerama which is why the title.

Anyway, I'm not nearly as frivolous and celebrity obsessed as these links make me seem. But I thought they were funny, and though most people out there probably already know what they are (as I found the second from the first) they are new to me.

Any for your hedonistic pleasure I give you
Go Fug Yourself
White Trash Palace

Friday, October 14, 2005

me being me

I'm behind in my plans, slacking, basically just being myself. I am co-writing a short script with some guy in England and we are working entirly over e-mail. The final work is due on Halloween and I haven't even written the first draft yet to send to him to retool. I have to get on that. I also said that I'd update my online novel A Symphony of Sweets weekly, yet I haven't updated it this week yet. That means if I don't write the next chapter today I've already failed my own expecations and goals. So, today, I shall write the next chapter and it will be posted before sunset eastern standard time on my other blog. Why before sunset? Because that's when I turn into a horrid bloodsucking beast from beyond the grave. That, and it's when shabbat (the sabbath) starts and computer usage is a no-no on the shabbat.

I fasted yesterday for Yom Kippur, and today (with out going too much into detail) my stomach and bowels are exacting their revenge for being so horribly neglected. If only I could convince them that it was not neglect rather a spriritual necessity. Alas, my bowels are not spritual by nature and mock my attempt at purity (my stomach just chuckles, always cowtowing to peer pressure from my other organs).

In other news some investment company or something like that saw my resume on Monster and left a message on my machine to schedule an interview. I need the interviewing practice so I shall call them back, but I am a bit scared as the only companies who have found my resume without my prompting seem to be the same companies who want to suck my soul out of my body through my nose (always through the nose, I can think of other places I'd prefer them to suck my soul out through, but it's not very polite mention such things in mixed company). I can't imagine this investment company is much different as I have absolutely no experience in money managment or investing. I figure it's like all the others and they are some sort of direct marketing firm, or want me to cold call people to sell bad investments. I shall schedule an interview none the less because beggers can't be choosers.

So, uh, carry on then....

Edit 5:30 PM
I have now uploaded the newest chapter ( Prelude part two) and it is available for your viewing pleasure. It's not as good as I want it to be, but as I concieved and wrote it in an hour I don't think it's that bad.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

So you think you're cool?

Well there's really only one way to find out.

One day I hope I will no longer need to pimp my own work, but until that day, the scarce readership that I have, please check out my new article What is Hip? featured at The Noyse.

Just remember, whether you are hip or not, I still love you and you're far better off than this guy.

Monday, October 10, 2005


I think my brother's cat is spying on me. As I sit here typing away he (the cat) lays pretending to sleep. How do I know it's pretending? It's right front paw is draped over it's eyes (a wierd sleeping position to say the least). I think it's trying to trick me, see even though the paw is draped over the eyes, its eyes aren't closed, and it's peeking out at me from behind its own paw. Watching me. I don't know what it expects me to do, but there we go. It'd be really cute, if it wasn't so freaky.

I can imagine it slinking off to it's own tiny computer later, typing away in its sending a message to its kitty overloards:
Slept most of the day, watched the strange new human who has arrived. He is different than all the others; he doesn't leave as frequently, in fact I'm beginning ot suspect he is like me, and isn't allowed out of the house. In other news, the older female human once again stole my excrement. Almost every day the humans come down and scoop it away. I can't imagine what they use it for, or what they want it so badly. I must observe some more. But I need to be subtle, I think the new human was onto me, so to throw him off I immediatly started cleaning my genitals. I got so, er, carried away, that I did not notice him leave. I must go, I hear them fast approaching.

End communications

Friday, October 07, 2005

A symphony of sweets

I'm going to try something I never have before. As a writing excersize I'm going to attempt to write a novel. But more than that, I'm going to attempt to write most of it on my other blog, As of yet untitled. Basically I'll be using that blog as a rough draft. The first thoughts and first drafts for chapters will be posted with no particular deadline in mind. I'm doing it as such half because its a convinient place to save my work, and to add to it from where ever I happen to be (and from what ever computer I happen to be on). I have a few ideas as to what is going to happen, but basically I'm going to be making it up as I go. I am going to try and add a chapter once a week. I'm not going to devote the blog to the novel as I plan on occasionally dropping in a self contained short story, but I am trying to figure out how to create a subsection devoted solely to the novel.

I just posted Prelude part one for said novel, which from now on will be called A Symphony of Sweets. You can check it out HERE

As always comments and thoughts on the fiction is always welcomed.

Prelude Part one
Prelude Part two
Prelude Part three

Damn dirty computer

So there is a bunch of blogs I read on a daily basis. Most of them you can find in the link section. There are a few that I read that aren't linked whom I found through Cute Little Box's Blog (RIP). I have them bookmarked in my computer for easy access. Unfortunately, my computer is not connected to the internet after the move and I've been using my mother's laptop. As such I don't remember the addresses off the top of my head and I haven't been able to read them. To the writers of said blogs (hopefully you know who you are), I will find you again, and I will read what I've missed because I can honestly say I've missed it. It's odd the type of attachments that grow, and how I do want to know what you'll come out with next.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

where to go from here


I've only been here for a week and already I'm sick of the place. I love my family and all but I gotta get a place of my own. It's been a freaking year of this stupid job search and getting absolutely bubkis. I say I want to write but I don't really do anything about it. Thing is, I don't really know where to start. I write, mostly fiction, so I guess what I really need to do is look for small magazines that publish fiction, build a portfolio. I should probably do the same with some non fiction, only I don't know where to send my stuff. Research. I write for The noyse but that can't be it. I need a real paying gig. Trying to figure out how to accomplish this. Anyway, that's enough for now. I think I'm good enough, I just need to actually go out and do it now. We'll see what happens. All I know is my allergies are really killing me and I have to get out of Queens.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

I'm wiped

I'm so fucking beat. Pardon my language but honestly, the house in queens is wicked small and there isn't enough room for everything, and the basement floor won't be finished until november (it's only half done now). So much stuff coming back and forth between the house, the cars, and the garage. My arms are bruised from carrying so much stuff. There is probably a lot I can write about but I'm far too tired.

Instead feel free to read my review of Tim Burton's Corpse Bride over at The Noyse.

I'll probably be absent for the next few days as it is the Jewish New Year and I am a practacing Jew (practice makes perfect, and I figure I'll get it right one day, right now though, boy do I need the practice).

On a plus note, a script I wrote just to see if I could write a noiresque sci-fi just got to the top ten over at Triggerstreet. It's always the one you don't expect. I spent years of my life on a script and it doesn't break 300. I spend a month writing this one (you can't download it without joining Triggerstreet) and bang, it hits the top ten. It's never what I expect. And if you happen to check out Triggerstreet you will notice that someone named Chrysalis who may or may not be a bunny is the reviewer of the month. For those curious, Chrysalis is my Triggerstreet psuedonym.

And here I'm going to check out. The Red Sox are up 7-1 on Yankees, so take that all my new neighbors (though since I'm in Queens they are probably Mets fans and don't really care). Cleveland lost (sorry dad) so the Red Sox is (are? grammatically I'm lost here) the wild card for the world series. I'm hoping for them going all the way again this year, but I'm not going to push my luck. As long as it isn't the Yankees, I'll be fine.