Posts
I can't write. I've stared at this blank space for almost a half an hour trying to come up with a good start and have come up with nothing. I hate my writing. I read it and its so awful it makes me gag. I'm not speaking specifically about my blog, just of my writing in general. I hate it. I really do. I find it trite, cliche, and above all else, extremly superficial. And not in a good Andy Warhol, Jasper Johns "clever" superficiality sort of way - just devoid of meaning or real interesting content (which you might feel about Warhol and Johns to begin with, but still, you get my point).
The whole kit and kaboodle, it really sickens me that I could have once thought it any good. The by product of this distaste with my work (which creeps up every six months or so) is utter self-loathing that I've wasted so much of my time on this garbage. And it isn't just any self-loathing, it's the worst kind: the pitying, self-indulgent, needy, annoying, self-loathing.
Anyway, it's all garbage, and I can't get anything out right. Even now, as I type I want to go back and rewrite this post, only I know that it won't be any better, no matter how hard I try.
So boo this, I'm done until I'm not.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Friday, February 02, 2007
Stinktastic
I am the epitome of lame. I've been home for four days after visiting Syracuse (which was freaking freezing) and I just now started doing my laundry. Why the wait, you may ask. Was it laziness (well, yes... but that's not the answer I'm really going for right now so I'm gonna say:)? No. Was it because my clothes smelled like J_ after absorbing the general smell from being in her room for five days, and I didn't want to wash it off? Yes.
I'm so freaking lame I hate myself right now.
Carry on then, nothing more to see here... not even any dignity.
I'm so freaking lame I hate myself right now.
Carry on then, nothing more to see here... not even any dignity.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Because you all really care what I think about trivial stuff (aka really lame post)
So maybe you don't really care what I think about trivial stuff. I don't know, but I haven't written in a while, and as I still have little to write about - by this of course I mean I have little I feel motivated about which to write - I shall now, in order to make this sentance ridiculously long, give you my thoughts on stuff; Hooray Stuff!
It's J_'s birthday on Thursday and I'm am bussing up to see her. I'm actually pretty excited about this, but at the same time a bit nervous as I have yet to buy her a birthday present (J_ if you are reading this, which I know you do sometimes, this is a lie, and I totally already bought a gift that I put a lot of forsight into, and you can skip to the next paragraph). I was gonna get her a Hamsa Necklace from here but the only ones I really liked (and can afford) are yellow gold and J_ doesn't really like yellow gold - and I also decided I didn't really want to go with Jewlery, so now I don't know and am running out of time.
I'm thinking of getting new glasses.
I don't like non-dairy cheese. Philisophically I have nothing against it, I just don't like it.
My script on Triggerstreet has been nominated to be script of the month of Janurary. There are two other scripts in the running. I'd like to be proud of this, but really I've read past scripts that have won and let me tell you, it's not such an honor. It's fun to say, but ultimately meaningless. It doesn't so much tell me that I'm good, just that I don't suck as much as everyone else on the site - which I guess is something.
And there you go, a post for the sake of posting. Hopefully next time I'll have something interesting to write about.
It's J_'s birthday on Thursday and I'm am bussing up to see her. I'm actually pretty excited about this, but at the same time a bit nervous as I have yet to buy her a birthday present (J_ if you are reading this, which I know you do sometimes, this is a lie, and I totally already bought a gift that I put a lot of forsight into, and you can skip to the next paragraph). I was gonna get her a Hamsa Necklace from here but the only ones I really liked (and can afford) are yellow gold and J_ doesn't really like yellow gold - and I also decided I didn't really want to go with Jewlery, so now I don't know and am running out of time.
I'm thinking of getting new glasses.
I don't like non-dairy cheese. Philisophically I have nothing against it, I just don't like it.
My script on Triggerstreet has been nominated to be script of the month of Janurary. There are two other scripts in the running. I'd like to be proud of this, but really I've read past scripts that have won and let me tell you, it's not such an honor. It's fun to say, but ultimately meaningless. It doesn't so much tell me that I'm good, just that I don't suck as much as everyone else on the site - which I guess is something.
And there you go, a post for the sake of posting. Hopefully next time I'll have something interesting to write about.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Villany is wrong
I urge everyone in this great nation of ours (well, the world too I guess, but really I'm currently just concerned with the US of A at the moment) to stop doing evil. To stop comitting crimes.
The simple reason, it's not because of any moral, ethical, or religious imperitive; or even for some altruistic, "let's make this world a better place" nonsense. That's a suckers game. Simply put: I hate jury duty. And for my sake, so I never have to sit through another ridiculously long and boring day down at the court building, stop comitting crimes and getting into accidents. People out there who do bad deeds, get into car accidents, sue because you spilled coffee on yourselves, whatever, I really don't care what it is specifically, just stop doing it!
I've had jury duty before in Massachusetts, but apparenly in New York being called to Jury duty means you become five years old once again. Not only are the same things explained over and over again, in a tremendously condescending tone - nearly ad nauseum - explaining what we are supposed to do, why jury duty is important, how we should do what we should do, when to eat, when to go to the bathroom, where to go, and what we are supposed to do when we get there - but it seems that mentally the potential jurors regress to a five year old mentality. Not only do they ask a continuous stream of the same questions over and over about the dumbed down instructions ("go to room 384". "raise your hand if I call your name", "Don't raise your hand if I call someone else's name", "Jury duty is important for freedom/justice/the american way") but they whine constantly. Oh my god the whining. Suck it up people. If you have to be there, try not to make it umbearable for everyone else.
The simple reason, it's not because of any moral, ethical, or religious imperitive; or even for some altruistic, "let's make this world a better place" nonsense. That's a suckers game. Simply put: I hate jury duty. And for my sake, so I never have to sit through another ridiculously long and boring day down at the court building, stop comitting crimes and getting into accidents. People out there who do bad deeds, get into car accidents, sue because you spilled coffee on yourselves, whatever, I really don't care what it is specifically, just stop doing it!
I've had jury duty before in Massachusetts, but apparenly in New York being called to Jury duty means you become five years old once again. Not only are the same things explained over and over again, in a tremendously condescending tone - nearly ad nauseum - explaining what we are supposed to do, why jury duty is important, how we should do what we should do, when to eat, when to go to the bathroom, where to go, and what we are supposed to do when we get there - but it seems that mentally the potential jurors regress to a five year old mentality. Not only do they ask a continuous stream of the same questions over and over about the dumbed down instructions ("go to room 384". "raise your hand if I call your name", "Don't raise your hand if I call someone else's name", "Jury duty is important for freedom/justice/the american way") but they whine constantly. Oh my god the whining. Suck it up people. If you have to be there, try not to make it umbearable for everyone else.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
I'm a noid
This is just a quick angry post. I got in trouble at work today because I did exaclty what my boss asked me to do. It was the wenesday before the office closed for break (the 20th). My boss called as I was walking out the door. I didn't even have to answer the phone, but being the dutiful employee I am, I did. She (having left for vacation already, calling me from CA on her way to Mexico) asked me to send a book to a reader. So quickly I called some readers, found the first one available, and then, ran the book in an envelope to the office mail center for it to be mailed out - just as she requested me to do. I asked how to send it, she said mail it. So I did. I followed the instructions to the letter.
Now the book never arrived on time, and the reader went away for the holiday. Because she asked me to send the book and not a copy of the book as per usual, we don't have the coverage we want, nor do we have the book to send to someone else. So I got the talk about why I mailed it instead of messengered it over, why I didn't find someone else, and so forth, when all I did was do exactly as she asked me too. So now I have to run around town, get the book from one place to another to get another reader, and look stupid to everyone involved - for something that isn't my fault at all.
when it's my fault I can deal with it because lord knows I screw up sometimes (and when I do I admit it). This time though, it wasn't my fault and yet I get the blame anyway.
Life is annoying.
On a plus note, I can't wait until this weekend when I finally get to take a vacation. Albiet only three days in a row, but that's two more days in a row than I've had since I can't remember when. Me and my sweetie in a B&B in Providence, RI. It should be sweet.
Now the book never arrived on time, and the reader went away for the holiday. Because she asked me to send the book and not a copy of the book as per usual, we don't have the coverage we want, nor do we have the book to send to someone else. So I got the talk about why I mailed it instead of messengered it over, why I didn't find someone else, and so forth, when all I did was do exactly as she asked me too. So now I have to run around town, get the book from one place to another to get another reader, and look stupid to everyone involved - for something that isn't my fault at all.
when it's my fault I can deal with it because lord knows I screw up sometimes (and when I do I admit it). This time though, it wasn't my fault and yet I get the blame anyway.
Life is annoying.
On a plus note, I can't wait until this weekend when I finally get to take a vacation. Albiet only three days in a row, but that's two more days in a row than I've had since I can't remember when. Me and my sweetie in a B&B in Providence, RI. It should be sweet.
Friday, December 29, 2006
now wii're cooking!
Last night at work I came up with the next really big game for the Nintendo Wii. If this game ever comes out I want you all to say that I came up with it first - even if no one asks about it. You should just go up to strangers and say that this guy Amichai came up with this idea (blank amount of time) ago. And when they say "Who are you and why are you in my house?" You should reply, "Yeah, I know, it's totally awsome! Pass broccoli please." That last bit is for your health, because I don't think any of you are eating enough greens. You'll thank me later.
What is this big hit, I know you're wondering? Iron Chef the video game. Using the motion sensitive Wii controler you must chop, stir, season, bake, drizzle, dice, fry and blend your way to the perfect meal in under one hour. It's a cooking lesson (as all recipe options one uses in the game can be done in real life) and a competitive video game all in one. Play against the computer, against a freind, against a stranger online. Whose cuisine will reign supreme?
It's the next level of gaming for kids and adults of all ages who aren't interested in traditional video games.
Only problem is I don't think it'll be compatible with Nonny's gaming vest.
What is this big hit, I know you're wondering? Iron Chef the video game. Using the motion sensitive Wii controler you must chop, stir, season, bake, drizzle, dice, fry and blend your way to the perfect meal in under one hour. It's a cooking lesson (as all recipe options one uses in the game can be done in real life) and a competitive video game all in one. Play against the computer, against a freind, against a stranger online. Whose cuisine will reign supreme?
It's the next level of gaming for kids and adults of all ages who aren't interested in traditional video games.
Only problem is I don't think it'll be compatible with Nonny's gaming vest.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Blogs, apparently, are not worthless (wow)
Ask and ye shall receive.
A little while ago I posted this.
My pal Charlie who reads this blog occasionally (unbeknownst to me until very recently) went out - by which I mean followed my link - and actually got me the t-shirt. So Charlie Rocks!
Charlie rocks anyway, she's just rocking harder right now. If any body else wants to rock as hard as Charlie, I'd be happy to inform you of the other things I want that you can purchase for me from the comfort of your own computer.
Next on my list, I realize after reading many comments that I unintentionally mislead many of you in my last post. I was confused at first when I read the comments, then, upon re-reading my post, I realized the problem. The previous post was not actually a dream I had. I was bored at work and was playing around and wrote that as a little prose poem, or dialogue for something yet to be written, or a prelude to a short story also yet to be written, or I don't know why, I was just bored. The beginning of "I had a dream..." was a mistake (as it works for the fiction of the poem/dialogue/prelude to a short story, just not the regular accounting of my life via this blog).
Though based on some of the comments, I don't know this makes me less weird now you know it's not actually a dream I had, or more weird as this is the sort of stuff I think about on my own, fully conscious.
And finally, I have become addicted to the game Snood. I can't stop playing it. I should be doing all sorts of other work, but instead I am playing snood. If you don't know snood, I recommend not finding out because it's insanely addictive. And if you know snood, then you know my problem.
Glad I straightened out the record. Readers (all five of you out there) be good to your neighbors, you never know who is secretly a psycho-killer bent on revenge for the horrid injustice of the world. Or, as a wiser man than me once said "Love your neighbors as you love yourselves, just choose your neighborhood carefully."
A little while ago I posted this.
My pal Charlie who reads this blog occasionally (unbeknownst to me until very recently) went out - by which I mean followed my link - and actually got me the t-shirt. So Charlie Rocks!
Charlie rocks anyway, she's just rocking harder right now. If any body else wants to rock as hard as Charlie, I'd be happy to inform you of the other things I want that you can purchase for me from the comfort of your own computer.
Next on my list, I realize after reading many comments that I unintentionally mislead many of you in my last post. I was confused at first when I read the comments, then, upon re-reading my post, I realized the problem. The previous post was not actually a dream I had. I was bored at work and was playing around and wrote that as a little prose poem, or dialogue for something yet to be written, or a prelude to a short story also yet to be written, or I don't know why, I was just bored. The beginning of "I had a dream..." was a mistake (as it works for the fiction of the poem/dialogue/prelude to a short story, just not the regular accounting of my life via this blog).
Though based on some of the comments, I don't know this makes me less weird now you know it's not actually a dream I had, or more weird as this is the sort of stuff I think about on my own, fully conscious.
And finally, I have become addicted to the game Snood. I can't stop playing it. I should be doing all sorts of other work, but instead I am playing snood. If you don't know snood, I recommend not finding out because it's insanely addictive. And if you know snood, then you know my problem.
Glad I straightened out the record. Readers (all five of you out there) be good to your neighbors, you never know who is secretly a psycho-killer bent on revenge for the horrid injustice of the world. Or, as a wiser man than me once said "Love your neighbors as you love yourselves, just choose your neighborhood carefully."
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Sweets before bed
I had a dream where I was the king of all marshmallows, only there was an attempted violent coup d'etat with military backing from the neighboring ocean of swedish fish. This of course led to war. I fought them as hard as I could with my army of gumdrop armed marshmallow men and women (as all my dreams exist in a perfect egalitarian world). The battlefield was strewn with the dismembered remains of gummy and marshmallowy guts. Sweet syrupy sugar blood carmilized the killing grounds tan.
In the end we were conquered by the swedes and I was forced to abdicate my licorice throne. They kept trying to put me to death, but my flesh and bone body was far too strong for their toffee gullitine.
Instead they decided to drown me in a tank of butterscotch, where the gooey liquid would congeal around me like amber over a fly, and I'd be put on display as the only man ever to rule over candy - their once and future king.
In the end we were conquered by the swedes and I was forced to abdicate my licorice throne. They kept trying to put me to death, but my flesh and bone body was far too strong for their toffee gullitine.
Instead they decided to drown me in a tank of butterscotch, where the gooey liquid would congeal around me like amber over a fly, and I'd be put on display as the only man ever to rule over candy - their once and future king.
Monday, December 11, 2006
A Cat-tastrophy
I don't know if there is an equivelent of "Cat Lady" for guys, but I have a strong feeling/fear that if there is I will be said "Cat Guy" (which shouldn't be confused with the lame Batman villan Cat-man - a not quite third rate knock-off of Catwoman - though Gail Simone has done some great things actually making him an interesting character, but I digress).
I was walking home from my father's synogogue on Friday night and this kitten, an adorable sivler colored kitten, starts following me home. It was dying for attention and I would have guessed it to be someone's pet - being that it was so comfortable with people. Only it didn't have a collar so it was a stray (or at least a house cat that accidently escaped and now didn't know what to do). I really, really (I can't stress this enough) wanted to take the cat home and adopt it, because it was so cute and needy and cute. Only I my folks already have two cats and there isn't room for any more (well there is, but they don't want another one).
Which makes me scared for when I have a place of my own again ( I miss having my own place) that I'll adopt stray cats left and right. And I know I will too. I'm going to grow up and be the scary guy on the block with hundreds of cats going to and fro through my house/apartment/shack/tent/cardboard box. It's scary, but I know it's gonna happen.
Also, the era of internet tests has yet to come to a close. Behold, a test to determine my political beliefs:
This is actually the second time I took it. The first time it said I was 8% nazi, which didn't make my sense to me at all. I may be many things (actually I am many things) but Nazi is definitely not one of them.
I think it's because I answered I was a little racist. Which is true. I think everyone is a little racist, or prejudiced or whatever you want to call it. It's human nature to be suspicious of people who are different. I'm not saying everyone is a (instert skin color, race, religion ect. here) supremicist, just that everyone has a natural inclination towards homogeny. It's why you get neighborhoods like Little Italy, or Chinatown, or The Lower East side (at least back in the early 20th century when it was mostly Jewish) in New York. And there isn't anything wrong with that. As long as you don't let it control you, you'll be fine. But to claim outright that there isn't prejudiced bone in your body is just lying to yourself.
Ok, rant over.
And I still insist I'm not even the slightest bit a nazi.
(also, I don't get the whole 67% anarchist, but I'm not gonna get into it. It's really a stupid test, but as devoted readers know, I love 'em).
I was walking home from my father's synogogue on Friday night and this kitten, an adorable sivler colored kitten, starts following me home. It was dying for attention and I would have guessed it to be someone's pet - being that it was so comfortable with people. Only it didn't have a collar so it was a stray (or at least a house cat that accidently escaped and now didn't know what to do). I really, really (I can't stress this enough) wanted to take the cat home and adopt it, because it was so cute and needy and cute. Only I my folks already have two cats and there isn't room for any more (well there is, but they don't want another one).
Which makes me scared for when I have a place of my own again ( I miss having my own place) that I'll adopt stray cats left and right. And I know I will too. I'm going to grow up and be the scary guy on the block with hundreds of cats going to and fro through my house/apartment/shack/tent/cardboard box. It's scary, but I know it's gonna happen.
Also, the era of internet tests has yet to come to a close. Behold, a test to determine my political beliefs:
You scored as Democrat. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'>
What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In? created with QuizFarm.com |
This is actually the second time I took it. The first time it said I was 8% nazi, which didn't make my sense to me at all. I may be many things (actually I am many things) but Nazi is definitely not one of them.
I think it's because I answered I was a little racist. Which is true. I think everyone is a little racist, or prejudiced or whatever you want to call it. It's human nature to be suspicious of people who are different. I'm not saying everyone is a (instert skin color, race, religion ect. here) supremicist, just that everyone has a natural inclination towards homogeny. It's why you get neighborhoods like Little Italy, or Chinatown, or The Lower East side (at least back in the early 20th century when it was mostly Jewish) in New York. And there isn't anything wrong with that. As long as you don't let it control you, you'll be fine. But to claim outright that there isn't prejudiced bone in your body is just lying to yourself.
Ok, rant over.
And I still insist I'm not even the slightest bit a nazi.
(also, I don't get the whole 67% anarchist, but I'm not gonna get into it. It's really a stupid test, but as devoted readers know, I love 'em).
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Happiness = breakdancing robots
Really, when you boil it down what can possibly be better than Breakdancing Transformers?
Could it possibly be Monkey punching dinosaurs? What about cats that look like hitler? Are either of those better?
I don't know, it's really hard to top Breakdancing Transformers.
But if anything can it's gotta be this hideous, evil, yet hilarious, and very wrong Blog.
Thanks to Merc, and Dorothy for having these links on their pages for me to steal.
Could it possibly be Monkey punching dinosaurs? What about cats that look like hitler? Are either of those better?
I don't know, it's really hard to top Breakdancing Transformers.
But if anything can it's gotta be this hideous, evil, yet hilarious, and very wrong Blog.
Thanks to Merc, and Dorothy for having these links on their pages for me to steal.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Brain drippings
It's official, I want to add this t-shirt to the list of things I want:
I mean come on, how cool is this? Take that you emo bastards!
Also, I have some a website for you kiddos to check out and love (if you don't already).
Overheard in New York Sometimes I can't believe the things that happen in this city, and sometimes I get nervous I'll wind up on this site.
And now I shall leave with with the religious thought of the day. As the Lord once said: "Be Fruitfull and multiply." Alright you heathens, you heard the Lord, go out there and get your groove on, it's a religious imperitive.
I mean come on, how cool is this? Take that you emo bastards!
Also, I have some a website for you kiddos to check out and love (if you don't already).
Overheard in New York Sometimes I can't believe the things that happen in this city, and sometimes I get nervous I'll wind up on this site.
And now I shall leave with with the religious thought of the day. As the Lord once said: "Be Fruitfull and multiply." Alright you heathens, you heard the Lord, go out there and get your groove on, it's a religious imperitive.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Just because (or, it's late, I'm bored, and I don't want to go to sleep yet)
So I was really bored at work this past week and my work buddy at Tribeca (my fellow intern) said I should create a Myspace page. I think Myspace is utterly ridiculous and very, very inane. But, I was bored, and she was insistent, mostly because she too was bored and wanted something to read (assuming I'd come up with something clever for my Myspace page). So now I have a myspace page. It's really lame, and I don't plan on really doing anything with it. I'm just keeping it until said buddy/fellow intern gets bored with it and then I'll take it down. I only mention this out of a interest of full disclosure, so no one thinks I'm hiding anything, I’m letting you know of my newest secret embarrassment (yes I am embarrassed, I now - albeit temporarily - have become a myspace person. Grahh!).
Luckily however, I shall not be alone in my embarrassment. Below you'll find a video of the aforementioned co-worker. As you'll notice she has a strange obsession with one of the dances from an older iPod commercial. This is actually her (I took it from her Myspace page) not some random video I found, so keep your minds out of the gutter. Don't worry though, she wears more at work.
Final note: J_ recently said that she thinks I should stop blogging about my daily adventures and devote this blog to essays/articles about pop culture and such (probably reviews of movies/comics/tv/ ect. As well). I don’t' think I really have the background to do this competently, and I said I probably wouldn't do that. Only the more I think about it, the more I wonder. I wonder how it would affect the few readers that I have if I did in fact change this blog? Would it be a change you'd all appreciate or something you'd rather not read? I can't say that I'd change my mind based on any of your thoughts, as J_ does have the most sway, I'm just curious what you all think.
All right, carry on then....
Luckily however, I shall not be alone in my embarrassment. Below you'll find a video of the aforementioned co-worker. As you'll notice she has a strange obsession with one of the dances from an older iPod commercial. This is actually her (I took it from her Myspace page) not some random video I found, so keep your minds out of the gutter. Don't worry though, she wears more at work.
Final note: J_ recently said that she thinks I should stop blogging about my daily adventures and devote this blog to essays/articles about pop culture and such (probably reviews of movies/comics/tv/ ect. As well). I don’t' think I really have the background to do this competently, and I said I probably wouldn't do that. Only the more I think about it, the more I wonder. I wonder how it would affect the few readers that I have if I did in fact change this blog? Would it be a change you'd all appreciate or something you'd rather not read? I can't say that I'd change my mind based on any of your thoughts, as J_ does have the most sway, I'm just curious what you all think.
All right, carry on then....
Monday, November 06, 2006
Why I am super cool!!!!
This weekend I...
Saw Borat in the theater (matinee showing).
Watched all six episodes of FLCL on DVD.
Watched Chumscruber on HBO.
Rented then watched Inside Man.
Rented and played God of War. (more hours this weekend spent playing this game then sleeping)
Read all four collections of Grant Morrison's run on the comic series Doom Patrol (can't find a good link to explain what this is).
And save seeing Borat I did this all by myself, alone, never actually leaving my couch save for food, bathroom and sleep.
I'm the coolest!!!!
Saw Borat in the theater (matinee showing).
Watched all six episodes of FLCL on DVD.
Watched Chumscruber on HBO.
Rented then watched Inside Man.
Rented and played God of War. (more hours this weekend spent playing this game then sleeping)
Read all four collections of Grant Morrison's run on the comic series Doom Patrol (can't find a good link to explain what this is).
And save seeing Borat I did this all by myself, alone, never actually leaving my couch save for food, bathroom and sleep.
I'm the coolest!!!!
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Do you ever...
...Compose your blog entry in your head during the day while whatever you want to blog about is still happening, then forget it when you get home and get angry even though it's only a silly blog?
...Leave a single cookie left in the cookie jar/package/dish/ect. because you don't want to be the one to throw away or clean up said jar/package/dish/ect.?
...Pretend you don't have change when a homeless person asks you for change, because you think you might actually need or deserve those fifty-three cents more than the person with no home?
...Have gay sex dreams (or if you're gay, have straight sex dreams) and even though you aren't gay (or straight) you still find yourself aroused upon waking?
...Walk into doorposts and glass windows because you just aren't paying attention?
...Feel the urge to stand up in the middle of a street with a big sign that says "JESUS SAVES: BUT ONLY WHEN HE OPENS AN ACCOUNT AT CHASE MANHATTAN BANK."?
...Feel bad that you can name Disney's seven dwarfs*, but have no idea who the Mercury Seven are** (let alone being able to name all seven of them***)?
...Wonder why we learn all about Neil Armstrong****, but are never taught about Yuri Gagarin*****?
...Wear underwear that is clearly dirty, just because you are too lazy to do your laundry?
...Sing the wrong lyrics to a song, then try and play it off like you did that on purpose?
Yeah, I don't do those things either.
*Sleepy, Dopey, Sneezy, Happy, Grumpy, Bashful, and Doc
**The first seven American Men in Space (they went up in the Mercury Missions)
***M. Scott Carpenter, L. Gordon Cooper, John Glenn Jr., Virgil "Gus" Grissom, Walter Schirra, Alan Shepard, Donald "Deke" Slayton
****First man on the Moon
*****First man in space (he was Russian, which is why he's left out of American text books)
...Leave a single cookie left in the cookie jar/package/dish/ect. because you don't want to be the one to throw away or clean up said jar/package/dish/ect.?
...Pretend you don't have change when a homeless person asks you for change, because you think you might actually need or deserve those fifty-three cents more than the person with no home?
...Have gay sex dreams (or if you're gay, have straight sex dreams) and even though you aren't gay (or straight) you still find yourself aroused upon waking?
...Walk into doorposts and glass windows because you just aren't paying attention?
...Feel the urge to stand up in the middle of a street with a big sign that says "JESUS SAVES: BUT ONLY WHEN HE OPENS AN ACCOUNT AT CHASE MANHATTAN BANK."?
...Feel bad that you can name Disney's seven dwarfs*, but have no idea who the Mercury Seven are** (let alone being able to name all seven of them***)?
...Wonder why we learn all about Neil Armstrong****, but are never taught about Yuri Gagarin*****?
...Wear underwear that is clearly dirty, just because you are too lazy to do your laundry?
...Sing the wrong lyrics to a song, then try and play it off like you did that on purpose?
Yeah, I don't do those things either.
*Sleepy, Dopey, Sneezy, Happy, Grumpy, Bashful, and Doc
**The first seven American Men in Space (they went up in the Mercury Missions)
***M. Scott Carpenter, L. Gordon Cooper, John Glenn Jr., Virgil "Gus" Grissom, Walter Schirra, Alan Shepard, Donald "Deke" Slayton
****First man on the Moon
*****First man in space (he was Russian, which is why he's left out of American text books)
Monday, October 23, 2006
Eye candy
I was going to post this on my site, because I thought it was Awesome (with a capitol A), but I figured it'd be best if I directed you to Amber's blog because with or without this video, her site is very much worth reading.
Anyway, if you want to see the best would be Snickers commercial ever (and you really really do) click the Snickers.
Trust me. It's Snickertastic.
Anyway, if you want to see the best would be Snickers commercial ever (and you really really do) click the Snickers.
Trust me. It's Snickertastic.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Why is this week taking so long?
I don't know what it is, but I feel like I've lived entire lifetimes in between the passing of the days. This is like the week that eternity built. Whatever it is, I'm sick of it already. I want this week to be over.
Anyone who can tell me why the week is so slow (and it hasn't even been a bad week or anything) please, let me know, and don't forget to show your work. I won't accept any equations without seeing the work that got you there. E=MC2 just isn't gonna cut it for me.
Anyone who can tell me why the week is so slow (and it hasn't even been a bad week or anything) please, let me know, and don't forget to show your work. I won't accept any equations without seeing the work that got you there. E=MC2 just isn't gonna cut it for me.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Dear person in the office who never flushes the toilet after using it,
FLUSH THE GOD-DAMN TOILET.
It's distgusting.
And you better hope I don't find out who you are, because there are swirlies in your own filth in your future if I do.
That is all.
It's distgusting.
And you better hope I don't find out who you are, because there are swirlies in your own filth in your future if I do.
That is all.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
I hate Manure*
First bit of news: You just know it's gonna be a funtastic** day when your first moments at work is spent in the bathroom cleaning off the horse shit from your shoe. Stupid mounted Police. There should be a special squad dedicated to following the horses around and cleaning up the manure.
Though I guess it's a little bit my fault not watching where I was walking. I mean, it was a big steaming pile of shit in the middle of the sidewalk. How did I miss that? Seriously?
Second bit of news: I applied to my current dream job on Monday and I know that I'm not gonna get it; probably won't even get interviewed, though I'll be on edge for the next week or so. The job: Assistant Editor for DC Comics. It wasn't a random sending of Resume; they have that listed as a position they are trying to fill on their Job Listings on timewarner.com (that's the parent company). I also applied for an administrative assistant position for the creative services dept. at Marvel Comics (as listed on Monster.com). Not exactly my dream job, but one I'd snap up in a heartbeat. God, I need a real job. So keep your fingers crossed kiddos.
Third bit of news: For all you TV junkies out there. Why aren't you watching Battlestar Galactica? I just saw the third season Premier. Holy Jesus. Best Show On Television. It blew my mind. Take everything that's good about Lost, then take away all the annoying crap, then multiply it by ten and that's how good Battlestar is. If you like Lost, or any Lost styled show (Heroes, The Nine, ect.) then you really should be watching Battlestar. It's quite possibly the best, smartest, most suspenseful, action packed and thoroughly engaging show on TV outside of Deadwood. Nothing else I've seen so far this season has even come close to being as good as Battlestar. Watch it, you'll get hooked.
*Kudos to anyone who got this mildly obtuse refrence to Back to the Future. You're just as big as a dork as I am. Good for you.
**Funtastic = Fun + Fantastic. A portmanteaus word for those curious.
Though I guess it's a little bit my fault not watching where I was walking. I mean, it was a big steaming pile of shit in the middle of the sidewalk. How did I miss that? Seriously?
Second bit of news: I applied to my current dream job on Monday and I know that I'm not gonna get it; probably won't even get interviewed, though I'll be on edge for the next week or so. The job: Assistant Editor for DC Comics. It wasn't a random sending of Resume; they have that listed as a position they are trying to fill on their Job Listings on timewarner.com (that's the parent company). I also applied for an administrative assistant position for the creative services dept. at Marvel Comics (as listed on Monster.com). Not exactly my dream job, but one I'd snap up in a heartbeat. God, I need a real job. So keep your fingers crossed kiddos.
Third bit of news: For all you TV junkies out there. Why aren't you watching Battlestar Galactica? I just saw the third season Premier. Holy Jesus. Best Show On Television. It blew my mind. Take everything that's good about Lost, then take away all the annoying crap, then multiply it by ten and that's how good Battlestar is. If you like Lost, or any Lost styled show (Heroes, The Nine, ect.) then you really should be watching Battlestar. It's quite possibly the best, smartest, most suspenseful, action packed and thoroughly engaging show on TV outside of Deadwood. Nothing else I've seen so far this season has even come close to being as good as Battlestar. Watch it, you'll get hooked.
*Kudos to anyone who got this mildly obtuse refrence to Back to the Future. You're just as big as a dork as I am. Good for you.
**Funtastic = Fun + Fantastic. A portmanteaus word for those curious.
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